Is Tuesday Too Early For Tears?

Okay...I just have to get it out there.  I'm sad.  Well, sad and excited if that's even possible.  As an adult I know it's completely possible to feel multiple feelings all at the same time...but that doesn't make it any easier.  


As much as I miss my family, friends, bed, tucker, etc. I'm still not all that ready for this summer to end.  I know as a teacher I do have a nice set-up...work really hard to 10 months and get 2 months off...I'm really not complaining...at all.  I'm just not ready to give up what I've been enjoying all summer.


I know that my friends would agree...they aren't ready either...
-not ready to leave their new children 
-not ready to set the alarm for a time we haven't seen realistically since June
-not ready to learn 150 new names
-not ready to start it all over again (whether at the same school or a new one)
-not ready to say good bye to their puppies
-not ready to grade
-not ready to reinstall all the procedures that our students were just starting to remember at the end of last year
-not ready for cooler weather (well...maybe some are!)


But this summer will be the hardest one for me to end.  I'm just not ready.  I want to come home...I do.  But I don't want to leave this.  Leave Dave.  Leave England (never thought I'd say that!).  Leave the flat that has become our home.  Leave the friends I've made.  Leave...


I tried to start packing today as I realize that it may be a process and I got as far as taking out the suitcase, opening, sitting down on the floor and crying.  I don't know what came over me.  I still have TONS of time left here with Dave...but it's just all been such a wonderful experience this far that I'm not ready to say good bye or even see you later.  Nope...I won't do it.  Not yet.  Not on a Tuesday anyways!  Nope.  I think I'll try again on Friday.  But not before.  There are way too many things to be happy about that we can't focus on the good-bye...not yet anyways.  


But then it's like I'm bi-polar or something...because the amount of sadness I feel when thinking about leaving is the same amount of excitement I feel at the same time.  So let's list a few things I'm looking forward to...
-seeing my family
-seeing my friends
-snuggling with Tucker
-re-introducting Tucker with his litter mate Izzi (they've been apart all summer too!)
-school to start (I really do love my job and do get excited to see my students again)
-movies with my mommy
-living it up in Milwaukee as much as I can with my baby brother, who's already a SENIOR at Marquette (where has the time gone!?!?)


See there is a light...but I'm just not ready to focus on it yet.


Can you tell I flip back and forth a lot with my emotions?  Dave's a trooper and let's me have my moments (as I promise to keep them few and far between) and for that I am truly grateful!  This summer is definitely one to remember!  :)  


Okay...pull it together Kate!!!  Blink back the tears.  You're a big girl.  People leave vacations (and loved ones) all the time.  This is not a first...and certainly won't be a last.  Blink back the tears and SMILE!!!!!  


And go start dinner!!!  :)